Today was Father’s Day and for those of us who have worked in the resturant business for many years, you learn very quickly that it’s a special holiday for the guy who helped Mom bring us into the world. For some reason, it isn’t treated quite the way Mother’s Day is, but it should because the big guy doesn’t always get the respect he deserves. I never knew my real father, but I knew very well, the man, who chose to bring me over from Seoul Korea, give me a life in this country 61-years ago. It was through him that I discovered my love for sports late in life and how even to this day still is a powerful driving force in my life. They say you don’t think about people everyday in your life and that’s true to a point. I use to have so many long talks with him about life, wisdom, morality and to this day I still incorporate his wisdom in everything I do. He was a Cincinnati Reds fan and a Bengals fan growing up in Hebron, Ohio which isn’t far from Zanesville. Many a summer we went up to visit his family in that one gas station town with a small grocery store and to this day, I think about the backwoods atmosphere and quiet laidback setting he grew up in. He never talked much about his past or the 20-some years he spent in the Army. I really didn’t know much about his family or some of the family secrets they had. I wish now that I had taken the time to learn and discover more about that man. He grew up in the great depression and was the elder male of five other siblings. Because his father past away when he was young, he was forced to watch over and take care of his younger sisters. He was a man of very few words and rarely spoke, but when he did always had something interesting to say. The day both he and my adopted Mother chose to make me their own, I was their second choice. The first male boy past away on the plane ride over from Korea and I was the next man up. How’s that for a “What If” story.
It’s been nearly 23-years since he left this earth. I remember getting a phone call from my sister about 8:00 am in the morning that he was gone. For a moment, I lay there thinking about all the things that I wished that I had said to him, but didn’t. The experiences that we could have shared together that we wouldn’t. I do remember that afternoon, I went to work waiting tables at the resturant like I always do and afterwards informing my boss that I needed a few days off to help take care of his funeral arrangements and be with the family. On the way home, I heard on the radio that Mark McGwire hit his 70th home run to set a record that Barry Bonds would later break. I remember thinking that my dad was now up in the heavens having a conversation with Babe Ruth about that moment.
My dad was in his late 80’s so it wasn’t like he left too early, but he would miss several important moments in my like. Like the first college football game I covered or the first MLB game I was at and appeared on TV because I was standing too close to Cubs pitcher Mark Lester or the time I was covering UK basketball and camera bombed the players entrance (accidently of course). My first published stories, multiple experiences that I accumulated and so many more. More importantly, I miss our conversations especially when my mood is blue and how he would always find a way to say the right thing.
That’s why today when I usually stop by to visit at his grave, I didn’t. Now, I wish I did. For the man, who didn’t have to be my father he chose to be which made it even more important. He gave me a father, a grand father and a great grand father that span the test of time.
For every athlete who’s father showed up for each practice of came to everyone of your games whether it was grade school, high school, college or even professional, try to remember that. I know it’s clique, but it’s true. Someday, you’ll be having the same conversation that I did with myself over and over again, so just tell him “Thank you” for everything before you can’t.
I also know that someday, I’ll see him again and when it happens maybe we can make up for lost time including that one Father’s Day that I simply didn’t.
